No matter how I look at it, it's your fault that I'm not popular.

*Includes spoilers. All media credits go to their owners.*

 As you might have guessed already, I really need to address this topic of one of the currently still (although I think it might be ending this week, but right now it's still) ongoing animes. Now I've been a weirdo all my life. As a child I used to play alone rather than find friends outside since - I just had so much fun imagining all kinds of stories and fantasize about getting super powers or similar. I'm not even joking: I really enjoyed spending time with myself. But as time passed, I obviously learned that staying all on my own was a bit too... weird. So I started fitting myself in. At first it was with a group of nerds and as time passed I turned it around entirely - tried being a bimbo and a rock girl etc. All so that I could feel like I belong somewhere. Except that feeling never ever came. And now, in the middle of my twenties, I've realized that all along I only needed myself and 1 other human to share things with. And that's what I've come to and it actually makes me really happy. Sure, I still socialize with other people at work or in uni and it's fine - but I don't ever want to hang out with large groups of friends again.

Tomoko

How this fits all in with the WataMote topic comes after a short introduction. No Matter How I Look at It, It's Your Fault That I'm Not Popular or WataMote for short tells the story of a fresh high school girl Kuroki Tomoko who has kept herself locked up in her room playing all kinds of ero-games and spending more time with the computer than with anyone living. And now she's under the impression that once she starts high school, things will work out as it would in a shoujou manga and she will be popular with both girls and guys and obviously some guy (preferably the most popular guy in school, as you could read from my previous post) will fall in love with her and... do naughty stuff to her. However she soon finds out that things don't just happen like that - especially if you're a creepy girl with messy hair, a whiny voice and can barely say two words to most people without stuttering. Basically a mojo - an unpopular girl.

"Cute" Tomoko

In her quest for becoming popular she tries out all kinds of scenarios, including dressing herself up in a "cute" manner, making a duck face, hitting on her brother and so on. And it's god damn horrible. I mean, the show itself is very good for portraying the mind of a teenage girl stuck in a shell which she has built into her own little twisted image of the real world. But damn, it's just awfully embarrassing. If you can watch this show with a cold stomach then I salute you - you are officially so kakkoii that you can't possible grasp how these situations can be real. And that's where the real punch kicks in - all these awful situations are very realistic. It's what really happens to people. And there are people who actually think the way Tomoko does - hell, I'm sure everyone has thought a bit like that. That literature and games should be based on more-or-less possible topics, so everything can happen, right? Except most of us has kind of grown out of it and knows that it doesn't really work that way exactly. But Tomoko is the perfect example of how every single romance anime showing an unlikely love between a popular guy and a wallflower girl is wrong. It just does not happen. At least not if you keep waiting for it and don't really do anything to make it happen.

And trying to make things happen is exactly what Tomoko is doing. Except that since she lacks a complete understanding of real life, things go horribly wrong. Like when she thought in episode 6 (spoilers inc.) that she looks better because she had sex with a guy... in a game.

So she then decides that if she has 2D sex every day, she'll turn popular IRL too. And it works!

...except it's because she hasn't washed herself and got a Coke splashed into her hair which attracted ants...

... so she ends up all lonely and sad that she doesn't have anyone to watch fireworks with and instead goes to an old rooftop where her and a couple of junior high school guys watch the action in a love hotel...

... and goes to a meet-and-greet where she requests peculiar things...

... and then mixes them up with her own voice and her mother hears it all...

... and then she pretends a random guy from the park is her boyfriend...

... which obviously doesn't turn out well and she has to apologize - why exactly is she doing it in a Ringu/The Grudge style, I'm not sure...

 ...but at this point my limit was reached. I can not watch any more of this show. I know I'm the number one whiner when it comes to typical romance-shoujou-school animes, but this just dashes to the other end of the scale and goes straight to batshit-crazy.

Now, I've already told you about my own adventures in the lonely side of the social life so you might imagine why this hits very much close to home. I can't watch this show more than 1 episode at a time and often I pause the stream before an embarrassing moment is about to come because it's just too painful to watch. But the saddest part of this entire thing is that there are people out there who are exactly like that and what's even worse - there is nothing, NOTHING you can do for them. Because they just need to live through these moments themselves and hopefully they'll learn something. You can't just walk up to someone and tell them: "Hey, you need to open up your eyes, get a grip and start communicating normally." Besides, what is "normal"? And why is normal so important anyway? I've been to the "normal" and it was boring.
Yet, while watching this show, I can constantly catch myself from thinking: "Oh god, PLEASE just handle this like a normal person." It's kind of sad. She is exactly what she is and unless she lets herself be weird to others, she'll never know what this "normal" thing is. I personally wouldn't know that I like being weird either, if I hadn't tried blending in first.

I guess what I'm trying to say is - if you've never experienced the feeling of being different, you really need to watch this show and get a glimpse of how it feels like. If you've been through the exact same thing, you can really look back and breathe a bit easier knowing that it's already past you. And if you're in there right now... well... please know that the whole world can be yours as soon as you graduate from the hell of embarrassment and awkwardness. Hang in there!
You too, Tomoko! Thanks for reminding us all how life really works. And if you can't get a grip on life, you can always just get a cat. Or a dozen.